Some of you may not know this about me, but I am 6 ft 1 & 1/2 inches tall. Some of you may be going WOAH! That’s one tall drink of water. Or PSH! Not even tall till you can touch your elbow to the ceiling (thanks for that one, Dad!)
To which I respond: This is me and who I am. Or at least, a part of me.
Very recently, I went to my first ever Tall Society – Tall Sister’s Brunch in San Francisco. I should present my state of mind at the time. I was a combination of anxiety ridden thoughts with genuine excitement for the event. Usually I an quash my anxiety but I have not been out on my own like that in a while. I got to events with Foxy Husband or out with friends, so this was truly the first time in quite a while that I went to an event for myself and by myself. Once I got there, it was like another wave of anxiety hit me. Brunch meant dressing up a little. I should have known, seeing all these tall goddesses in their beautiful spring clothes, with a wide range of footwear (all those heels, drool!). It just didn’t click into my brain that I should dress up. The last major wave of anxiety hit me when I realized I didn’t know anyone, I felt awkward, and I just don’t do well in crowds of people I don’t know.
But don’t let it get you down, I still managed to have a great time! I met a bunch of major babes, who were honest and funny. And did I mention, legs up to Canada? We were able to share stories about being young and tall, being older and tall, being in love and tall, being in sports and tall, and you get the gist, right? There was a raffle full of fun prizes and a guest speaker: the smart and beautiful Alicia Jay from Tall Swag. Her speech really made me want to cry. Not bad tears, but it was like letting go some of that anxiety I was holding in. This woman was reaching out to us about being supportive of our sisters in tall, not in tall, and of ourselves. I’m really good at supporting others but keeping myself in mind can often go overlooked.
I used to think I had a handle on my self-esteem and self-confidence. But there is nothing like a meet and greet to throw you for a loop. To remind you that it is a life long process and forever changing. That I may have my moments of doubt, but to remember that they will pass.
And wouldn’t you know? The next day the Tall Society published a blog, Take Back Your Power. So take that low self-confidence. I’m gonna work on you for a bit until we get back to a better base level. Plus, the next meetup? You bet your sweet ass I’ll be there, dressed to the nines in my favorite pair of heels.
So why did I share this with you? Because it was hard, for me. I went in with a completely mismatched mindset. A lot of times, I keep the hard stuff to myself or make a sarcastic, self-deprecating joke. But I’m starting to think I need to make that change; less jokes more honesty.
PS. A bit of shameless promotion for my new friend, Desi. I met her at the brunch and she is just amazing-beautiful-smart! She is the creator of the fun Instagram, 2 Tall 4 Stalls. (The struggle is real my friends.) Also these vendors were at our event! The lovely Shane and her shop, Let Height Arise. The lovely Erin and her shop, Blonde Amazon. The lovely team of Dawn, Noaj, and Robin, and their shop, Natural Splendor